Having children is often seen as a blessing. Raising and caring for them is not that easy. It is common for children to do things that are not actually in the parents’ interest, which can inevitably cause trouble. When this is angry, parents sometimes forget not to say words that should not be taught to children. Toddlers pick up more easily what parents and the environment say. If you want your kids to be polite and not rude when they grow up don’t say these sentences to children, OK?
Don’t Say These Sentences To Children
1. “If you’re naughty, I’ll leave you here!”
Whether they realize it or not, parents often threaten and scare their children in hopes that they will obey. And not many parents understand that children’s biggest fear is losing themselves and feeling insecure. Because of this, these words can cause trauma in both children and adults. Parents could take the time to explain to children intelligently or use reasonable reasons. Refrain from taking shortcuts with threats because you’re too lazy to explain.
2. “Don’t disturb. Mom’s busy!”
Although it seems natural to say that these words can have a psychological effect on children, for example, when mom is cooking, or dad is reading the newspaper, the child suddenly comes to play or to ask for help. In such a situation, parents usually yell to avoid being disturbed because they are busy. You may need to realize when this happens that, the kids will find their presence meaningless because they will be told to leave. If you are very busy with work, try to divert your child’s attention from other activities. Only when it’s free, come and help them.
3. “Your brother could do that when he was little. Why can’t you?”
Please never compare children. Do you want them to grow up without self-confidence? Comparing children will only make him confused and eventually less confident. Often children even hate their parents because they are treated badly by this comparison. Either comparing them to siblings, cousins, or friends can damage a child’s ego. Children may have feelings of inferiority in adulthood. Parents need to understand that every child is a different individual. They have their personality. When you compare a child to other children, you want your child to be different. Let them grow into you.
4. “Don’t be a crybaby. Why are you always crying?”
Don’t you still cry when you grow up? What’s wrong with these emotions? Children cannot yet express feelings through words and can only channel them through crying. It is normal for a child to be sad or anxious. And just saying the word “not” doesn’t mean your child is any better. Saying this word will teach children that sadness and crying are unnatural. Crying itself is an expression of certain emotions that every human being has. Dealing with crying children would be better if you ask them to explain what makes them sad. This is how parents teach empathy. So don’t say these sentences to children if you wish your children have empathy when they grow up.
5. “You always make a mess around the house” or “Never want to tidy up your toys.”
Although it’s often said reflexively, learn not to say it repeatedly. The phrases “You’ve always…” or “You’ve never…” convey many negative meanings. Psychologists say the more such words are told, the more children will do them—children who never clean up toys, for example. Parents should only ask questions and not play with the words always or never judgementally. Ask what you can do to help your child change their habits. For example: “I’ve noticed that you often don’t put your toys away when you’re done playing. Do you want to help mom? Let’s fix it together.” Statements like these give children security and make them feel helped.
6. “It doesn’t work that way. Let mom do it!”
Do you want your child to keep failing because they don’t learn how to do it? Let them know and develop. This phrase is often thrown out when parents can’t wait to see their child’s work system. For example, if the mother tells the child to cut or fold something, the child does not do what you want. Eventually, that sentence was spoken and became a big mistake. After that, the children no longer know how to do and get things done properly. You are not allowing your child to develop. It would be nice if the mother would take cooperative steps by inviting the child to do the work together while explaining how to do it.
7. “You insolence!” and negative labels about children will hurt their feelings.
Because it’s not a trivial problem, you need to start breaking this habit. Children can be compared to a sponge. They absorb everything that is around them, especially the labels given to them by their parents. If you say a child is fat, naughty, ugly, or stupid, don’t be surprised that sooner or later, they become the person you ascribe to them. Change your words to be full of positive energy. Instead of “You’re an idiot!” it would be better if you said, “If you study hard, you can get a better grade, you know. After all, you’re smart too.” Isn’t that easier on the ear and more calming?
While raising and caring for children is never easy, it can be fun too. From childhood, parents must be extra vigilant about protecting their social environment, including what is and is not appropriate for them. After all, parents are their children’s first educators. Think again before you say, cause sooner or later, what you hear will affect your mentality. Hope this article about “don’t say these sentences to children” helpful for parents.